S&W » Ysa Perez

My last day turned into the first.

Ysa Perez — Sun, 29 Aug 2010 14:18:01 +0000

My last day at GQ was supposed to be this upcoming Wednesday.

Along with interning at NYLON, I did a solid 9-10 months of free work. Granted, I didn’t enter both environments for lucrative results, but I’d say I’ve paid a lot of dues and well, it actually worked out.

Last Thursday I was hired at GQ, to essentially continue my role there, but now it feels very legitimate. It’s been a long three months, the title was intern, but the work had substance. I felt like I was on the same team, like I had a place there.

I’m incredibly honored to be on that floor, let alone converse with people who have been in the industry for years and I highly respect. Although I want to one day shoot, it is incredibly validating to know someone noticed my hard work, that I care about what I’m doing, even if at times it’s a menial task. To have that recognition and have my boss ask, “Would you like to stay and we can pay you” made all this struggle, all the hustle, suddenly really fucking worth it.

I can’t tell you how hard the Photo department works, along with Art. To be a part of that is insanely humbling, and I’m looking forward to our upcoming projects.

The position is temporary, just until December 31st for now, but it’s great to know I’ll have some stability up until then which I’ve been craving ever since I got here in May.

The constant moving, the hustle, all that, has been really hard and it’s just an amazing relief.

Eric and I will be moving this week to our house, we finally got a house, I can’t tell you how fucking incredible that feels. I’ve been living in someone else’s room for three months, using someone else’s desk, someone else’s keys. I’m ready for my own shit, my own things, a job, again, this recurring notion of stability and reassurance that I have a roof over my head, I can eat, all that.

Everything sort of intersected at once, it’s come to this weird crossroads — but I’m happy to be here.

Attached is one of the diptychs I shot for Jay Sabatino — his team is still designing the look book so I’m not exactly sure how it’ll be sequenced, but here it is — and my lovely dude Sam Waldman at FORD Models.

august you crazy.

Ysa Perez — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 05:20:13 +0000

Now that 3 months have gone by, I’ve reached a pivotal crossroads in terms of career, life, everything.

In 2 days I start a waitressing job.
In 14 days I shoot my third look book this month.
In 20 days I have to move and find a place to live.
In 21 days I am no longer at GQ.

So basically in a month I’ll be an “adult” and it’s a really frightening realization.

Summer’s been dope. Different then what I’m used to… but amazing regardless.
I faced a lot of changes with relationships, both romantic and not, and my own personal growth.

The decision to full time shoot and be a photographer was hard to do.
It might seem easy — after all I went to photo school, what the fuck else did I really want to do? But it was difficult nonetheless.

I was in the elevator today at Condé Nast and this woman was talking to two dudes about how she gave up being a photographer, and how difficult it is; that it’s so much self promotion and constantly putting yourself out there and I stood there thinking “you’re so fucking right.” And I said it out loud, I said “you’re right, I’m a photographer.” And they laughed (nicely) and said good luck.
I think in order to really commit to being a photographer you really have to let everything go. And full time think about making work and what your next move is. Even saying “I’m a photographer” felt weird — like I wasn’t worthy yet of claiming that’s what I do — or that’s who I am. And I haven’t done it yet completely, but I’m trying really fucking hard to get there.

The past month has been crazy, I shot a look book for Sosume and this past Sunday shot one for Jay Sabatino. In a couple weeks I will be shooting one for Married To The Mob which I’m really stoked on and have refrained from talking about. Not because I’m an asshole but, I haven’t had time to really write on here, which is upsetting, because I miss the activity on Sunday & Wednesday, I really do. So hopefully Sunday I can write about that because the Married To The Mob girls are real dope and I’m real excited about finally getting to work with the incredible and infamous Leah McSweeney.
Leah if you read this, I’m stoked if we get that blue bentley to shoot, I’m snappin my fingers your way homie.

This past Wednesday however I got to do something I’ve yet to do and am really aspiring to. I shot the actor Andrew Garfield for October NYLON and it went pretty amazing considering that is a rare subject I get to photograph.

Andrew is currently in that new facebook movie and will be the new Spiderman in 2012, so I was really looking forward. I shot it at the Crosby Hotel and thank god he was mad down to earth because it was miserably hot outside and I had dude flexing like, fall wear sweaters. We really got on, he was hilarious. I also am a sucker for British dry humor, but he was humble and insanely easy to work with. I let him take a heinous picture of me and in exchange I asked for a picture together for my memory. He even let me make a Spiderman joke. Ok I made a shit load of them. Whatever, just let me.

I had the amazing Staci Child do grooming whom I’ve wanted to work with for a while, and Paolo Nieddu style and I just got the film back this week and it looks damn good. Listen I could barely remember to take the dark slide out, I haven’t shot film since Japan so it’s miraculous it even came out, so I’m going to admit that it looks great.

here are last weeks outtakes, look for it in October NYLON.
until Sunday…

uneventful life update

Ysa Perez — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 01:42:05 +0000

[vimeo 13530706]

blah blah blah ^ there

pix down here…

Soooo, my birthday present is this album cover.

Ysa Perez — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 04:49:32 +0000

I got five albums in the mail the other day, thank you Pedro. I asked for one and I get this little French package in front of my door. The special edition ones come in jean pockets. The inside says my name. The inside is actually all my photographs, not just the cover. From February to now, all this hard work. And it’s in front of me, in tangible form. Her first album at 22, and my first album at 22.

23 here I come.

(PS if you live in New York, come to Webster Hall this Friday, my birthdayyyy! little bit of ed banger family coming, say “ysa” at the door, xo)

I’ve been watching too much Sex & The City.

Ysa Perez — Sun, 30 May 2010 06:53:02 +0000

Can you believe I’ve never seen this show? Well, thanks to HBO On Demand I’m committed to seeing the actual movie. Fuck.

I’m going to blame it on the fact that I live with five girls in the East Village, but let’s be real, I did this to myself.

I work at GQ now. I intern and assist four amazing people and their incredible Photo Director. Man, this lady, she changed my life, that is a definite over exaggeration, but, I’m pretty sure I love her.

I kept it a secret but when I landed in New York a couple weeks ago, I went straight from JFK > AIRTran > A Train > L Train > my house > L Train > N Train > Condé Nast Building with minutes to spare for my 3:30pm interview. It’s like trying to get into the White House in this place, I swear. I still use the bathroom at NYLON when I’m in Soho, I just walk in cause no one gives a fuck. Condé Nast is like some secret service shit. I died. The elevator takes you up and you just see, Vogue, Teen Vogue, GQ, Vanity Fair, Glamour, etc. etc. and I’m just thinking “I’m not worthy.” I mean, I think everyone in the elevator thinks it. Unless you are Anna Wintour and run shit (oh god please let me bump into you but not really.) The closest I get to feeling glamourous is that the womens bathroom is actually across from GQ at Teen Vogue. Then I run back to my intern corner.

I met with two amazing women who told me I was more than qualified and feared I’d get bored, and one even mentioned she liked my work on my site and they both asked, “Do you have your book?”
Now let me tell you. That’s an amazing feeling. Yeah you bring your book, you lug that shit around hoping it’ll be put to use, but it rarely is. I NEVER expect someone to give a shit about it. I’m not there to shoot, I’m there to fax, take orders etc. If they inquire — that is a good sign. There is an implication of interest, and that is some hope.

That’s when I had to choose. I couldn’t do Complex and GQ. I also moved to New York with an embarrassing amount of money. And I still have no side job. (No one’s hiring yalllll) so I made a choice. And it was real difficult. But fuck it, I’m taking the chance. I’ll be real. I’ll probably never do anything substantial at GQ like I could have at Complex, but, I’m interested in the industry and I want to see how a real, established magazine works especially under a corporation like Condé Nast. I’ve seen the ins and outs of a smaller magazine, however I want to see the other side, big budget productions, iconic covers and infamous designers.

So I had to be approved, once more. The following week was the Dora test. Oh Dora. I’ve never seen Devil Wears Prada but I’m assuming that’s what it felt like. She was talking with someone and motioned me in her office without talking. I sat down freaking out. She asked, “Tell me about yourself.” I mumbled. Or ranted. Or something. I was trying to gain physical composure. But verbally I was all, “Blah blah I’m an idiot please like me.” She gave me a slight smile and said, “What do you like to shoot?” and then my eyes lit up, and I explained as articulately as I could. She says, “Do you have a book with you?” and pulls a chair next to her and made the meeting less of an intimidating interview and more of a dialogue. And it was fucking amazing. To just sit with this woman and be like “This is what I like doing.” and get her feedback was unbelievable. Watching her flip the pages was pretty excruciating, she says, “Must be exciting to be published” but not in a way of praise or anything, just merely commenting. I say, “Well yes” and try not to act like a total moron. And then the question came up, which I get constantly. “Why are you here? Do you want to be a photographer, or do you want to be in magazines?”

I suppose I don’t know. I sat there speechless. Trying to find the words and not fuck my chance up within the last 4 minutes of this dwindling interview. I want to seem direct and concise, but what the fuck do I want to do? Why do I have to choose? Are you making me choose? I just got here last week. I said, all I know is, when I worked at NYLON, I liked coming in everyday to a place where we worked on something together and got something done, I miss that atmosphere.” She’s perplexed and says, “Really?” I say, “I’m sorry, do you not believe me?” And that’s when she prefaced and said “I’m not trying to change your mind or persuade you” and I heard the most valuable statement anyone has ever said to me.

“Well, if I were 22 and I just graduated, I’d like to believe I could make it as a photographer.”

And that was it. Dora read me like a fucking book in ten minutes.

I am fucking scared. I am scared. I realized the fear I have, “Can I make it as a photographer?”

And here she is, perfectly articulating this romanticized desire that I can’t believe for myself.

I don’t know. I’m leaving it with outtakes/tests from my shoot last week.

Credits are as follows, thanks to my amazing team.

model: michelle salem make up: fernando haddad hair: kayla michele styling: courtney raniszewsk

may 19th.

Ysa Perez — Wed, 19 May 2010 21:59:41 +0000

i’ve lived in new york for a week now, and it feels no different then when i visit… i still feel like i need to pack and go home, but no, i’m here forever. i almost can’t even believe how much happier i am here.

the uffie feedback has been really nice, i can’t believe it’s an album cover. i’m on wikipedia yall!

but let me say not having a job is real weird. i’ve either been at interviews or sitting at my boyfriends house watching seinfeld eating — we’re real fat. just drinking wine and babysitting. it feels really nice. but i feel useless. for real.

luckily,

tomorrow i am shooting VV Brown for FOAM again.

i got the magazine in the mail, it was real nice, very beautiful publication. this VV Brown chick seems real cute, i’m looking forward to meeting her. and then afterwards shooting a fashion ting for them for Vena Cava. ah fashion. im not shooting a DJ?? jesus. let’s see how that goes. i’m pretty excited. girl vibes are way different. it’s a challenge. especially with an all female crew, what up ladies i see you!

i took a self portrait today when i got home from aaron’s house. disgusting shirt, bedroom hair. in my east village summer living. oh it’s so nice to not be in the hood even though i love you brooklyn. i haven’t taken one in forever. felt awkward.

happy GRADUATION everyone.

“uffie of course.”

Ysa Perez — Wed, 12 May 2010 17:33:59 +0000

woke up in the best city in the world to find out I shot the album cover for Uffie.

someone twittered it to me and i saw it on my phone perplexed, then emails started coming in, then busy p, the lovely pedro winter repped it on cool cats, following an awesome text from our far away french friends mehdi and the ed banger crew, and an enormous amount of twitter responses made me realize “holy shit.”

thank you guys all so much –

and special thanks to Nathalie Canguilhem — amazing art direction on this.

6 days left.

Ysa Perez — Wed, 05 May 2010 13:05:01 +0000

I bought a one way flight to New York for next Tuesday. I did the same thing last March when I moved and never came back to visit.
I’m going to be living in the East Village for a bit (thank you proximity to L train) until August when I’ll find a proper place. It’s pretty much the perfect sublet, the chicks are cool, my boyfriends house is 3 stops away on the L, and she’s leaving her furniture til August. The illest summer sublet. Everyone knows summer in New York means never being at your own house.
I literally came back from New York the 21st, wasn’t going to go back until I moved the 15th, then suddenly went back 3 days later for a job interview, dirt broke. I suppose that shows how determined I am.
In a couple hours I am surrending my huge 24 inch computer to my friend Lex who happens to be in town. I can’t believe I’ve been in NY and Miami with Lex, but now he is in my own town coincidentally driving back to New York today. Although it’ll suck to not have the interwebs, it’s not exactly inconspicuous, jesus I need a laptop. Lex is here because he’s the brains behind this drink called Prometheus Springs and randomly just sold it all to Wegmans which is why he’s here. So fucking random.

It’s weird, I had a set plan. I was going to move the 15th when the girl told me anything after the 13th was cool. Then I found out my boyfriend is playing a show the 14th. Then Complex asked me to shoot something the 12th. Then suddenly I find myself buying a ticket for the 11th after just getting back. New York always finds some weird way to bring me back sooner than I expected. Everyone asks me, “are you excited?” But I think I’ve flown back and forth, driven, bussed to New York like 7 times starting from Japan. Which has left me to not really get work done, scan, none of that but — coming to Rochester feels like visiting anyways, never feels like home.

I’ll be interning at Complex a couple days of the week — we aren’t sure when/how many days, but it started with me being asked to shoot a piece the 12th. The staff is super dope, real nice, I randomly showed them my book a couple weeks ago while I was visiting my friend who is the Art Director there. Surprisingly they were real into it and asked what my deal was. I like the vibe there, I mean, I guess my stuff makes sense there. I went to Spin as well and it went pretty amazing. Showing your book after it’s just been sitting collecting dust is pretty nerve wrecking. It’s just like, “Is this even good?” but it’s too late because someone is flipping through the pages in front of you.

The Uffie situation is finally resolved — I sold the rest of the photos after her label approached me about wanting them. I never would have thought the chick I was listening to in my headphones in K lab back in ’08 would somehow lead me to finding a picture of mine in Elle. Wow, 2008. That’s not that long ago, but in terms of work, seems forever ago.

Lex will be here soon so I guess this is it. Congratulations to all of you graduating soon, you must be stoked, I’m sure I’ll see mad of you in the city eventually. These are photos from the past month from New York, assignments and complete randoms.

So.

Ysa Perez — Sat, 24 Apr 2010 20:19:35 +0000

I have nothing to say anymore. I feel like I am at a really pivotal point in my life and I have to make a move. I went to New York last week. I am moving permanently May 15th. I am planning to not go to graduation ceremony. I think my mom is upset. She wants me to close that chapter of my life however I have been done with school mentally for a while.

Doing it.

Ysa Perez — Sun, 11 Apr 2010 07:33:32 +0000

Well I’m trying to.

Flying to New York tomorrow to see some kute dude and attempt to establish some sort of foundation down there. Oh you know, easy! Job, apartment, finances, easy shit. *end sarcasm* But seriously, apparently being home for a week has already killed me so I’m off til the 21st. Yeah so. I went back and forth. Live here, save money? Live there, try to make it? I don’t know man. I guess I’m going to try to make it. I’m not certain. I have no concrete plans which suck but, New York really isn’t about concrete anything, you just go. And try like everyone else is trying. I will probably work at my restaurant again and be on the grind until opportune moments come up. I still shoot for NYLON which is nice. Thanks Stephen. Was asked to shoot MNDR this Wednesday so that should be interesting. More electro girl uh singers in my portfolioz. I think I need more…

I haven’t been thinking about photography in a minute! I mean sort of but no not really. Perhaps it’s lack of daily use of flex tights and really nice monitors, I am not sure yet. But it’s been refreshing. I’ve sort of been thinking like… about my “style” and what I’m trying to say. I’m bummed dude about my light meter I really am. I can’t afford to just replace it, but at the same time I’m pretty sure it was a godsend because I just cannot afford to shoot 120 anymore. It’s awful. I am so sad for real. G10, it’s you and me now I guess.

G10 really killed the Foam/Uffie thing, I mean, I’m really pleased. And the feedback from everyone has been dope. I think it’s more so this… battle within myself. You know, the argument of using something that requires so much technical knowledge (my mamiya RB) and onto something so handheld like this that “anyone can use.” So like it’s killing me, I feel less credible, at the same time, a photograph is a photograph right? Does that take away my talent? Do I have any? However, medium format was truly limiting me. I wasn’t on a high horse, I really just like shooting it more than digital, but the pictures I have been making lately would have never happened if I shot 120. I guess I can’t do much about it. I can’t shoot 120. End of story. Just can’t. Sure do miss you though.

Homegirl linked me to this the other day, thanks Sheena! Uffie in SPIN. Which I didn’t even know about. I remember a couple days ago being sent this contract that I agreed to which is, the pictures can be used free of charge etc. Her management and label have been awesome; they really like the photos so I want to say thanks & merci. So I suppose losing that 120 was not a complete loss (but booo I’ll always think about what might have been…)

Headline is LOL. Also can we just say Ke$ha came AFTER Uffie, thanks. Photograph looks entirely different. Still cool. It’s also here on her label’s website, and looks exactly how it should. So like yeah, stoked, came together, even after massive stress.

And these are outtakes from Foam that I am playing around with for my eventual website relaunch (pleeeeeease)

They were taken at the Bowery Hotel in her hotel room on the 22nd of March in probably…. 30 minutes? Shooting musicians means, never any time. They have some interview, another photoshoot, a flight to catch, something to do, always, it’s pretty stressful. So it’s very satisfying when it comes together.

Side bar, anyone make one of these Forum Spring things? I just made one because I copy everything Eric does on the net. It’s weird. But could be useful to ask each other about each other’s workflow/processing/etc. Not that I don’t think it’ll probably be used for internet creeps but, hey.

So long and PS, aren’t you guys stoked you’re almost out of there?

Oh right, I went to Japan.

Ysa Perez — Fri, 09 Apr 2010 18:33:20 +0000

I have way too much 35mm from Tokyo travels. It’s just sitting here waiting to be opened and retouched. I am re doing my website, I hate all that shit. I just hate it. So slowly all of this stuff will fit in somewhere. Until then (I hope two weeks or so), it goes here.

These photographs represent the travels in which Pase and I shared in Tokyo. I love you dude.

Sooooooo.

Ysa Perez — Sun, 04 Apr 2010 05:10:26 +0000

I am back from Miami. Fun month is over.

Somewhere along the way from JFK to MIA, my film with Uffie on it and light meter were taken from my luggage. Yes I’m pissed. Yes I was in a rush. Yes I should have carried it on. I didn’t. That’s going to be a fun claim.

So here are candids from my G10, New York and Miami. Always fun seeing friends from all over in one place. And boyfriend.